Couples Therapy in New York City
Have you noticed that you and your partner are arguing more frequently than you did in the past? Are the previously successful conflict-resolution techniques that you have used falling flat this time? Have you felt a growing distance between you and the special person in your life? If you answered yes to any of these questions, then it is a sign that your relationship is going through a difficult patch and could benefit from the professional guidance offered by a certified couple therapist. Thankfully for you, help is at hand.
With a wealth of experience in finding real and lasting solutions for couples from across New York City, Robin Bryant, PH.D. developed a reputation for offering an impartial yet effective middle ground for couples who are unable to communicate properly. Once that initial wall of silence has been broken down, solutions are often found soon after.
So, if you are reading this it proves you are serious about your relationship and are eager to find a way of repairing the current fractures that exist. With the help of Robin Bryant, PH. D., this can happen. Call my New York City Office today and let me help you.
What to Expect in Couples Therapy
Many couples, both married and unmarried, have areas of their relationship they’d like to improve. If you’re working towards building a life partnership with someone, it’s important that you feel you can be open and honest with them. But unresolved arguments and past traumas have funny ways of sneaking up on you and jeopardizing the relationships you hold most dear.
Couples thinking about attending couples counselling already have a big hurdle in front of them: the hard work that’s required to fix unproductive coping strategies in a relationship. So to make sure your experience in couples therapy gets off to the right start, we at the office of Robin Bryant, Ph.D. have prepared this list of key things to keep in mind when starting couples therapy in New York. Read them here:
Come Prepared With Answers to Basic Questions
Your therapist Robin Bryant, Ph.D. is here to help you resolve issues that are taking away from the enjoyment and value of your partnership. Your initial few sessions will be about getting to know you and your partner and explore the basic aspects of your relationship dynamic. Expect some questions about your experiences in childhood—they’re important for any therapeutic process!
It helps if you can come prepared with some general information about yourself and your relationship. Unlike many aspects of your relationship, this should be done individually, although you and your partner should agree on the goal of attending couples therapy together.
How Long Does Couples Therapy Take?
This isn’t a question we can quickly answer, but we can reassure you that the couples therapy you’ll receive from Robin Bryant, Ph.D. is quick and targeted. We promise that:
- We won’t rehash every fight you’ve ever had. Robin Bryant, Ph.D. needs a basic picture of your relationship history, but couples therapy is about solving problems in the here and now. We’ll listen to your grievances, but we’ll focus on what issues are most pressing in the present and work from there.
- We’ll work with you to set short-term goals. Therapy succeeds when everyone involved—you, your partner, and your therapist—has a clear goal to move towards. Couples therapy is meant to be short-term. While that’s not always the case, we’ll work to develop a timeline that moves towards a healthier relationship in under two months.
- We’ll make decisions together. No one member of the therapy team—and that includes your therapist—gets to make decisions themselves. Your therapist will make suggestions, but you are free to make the decisions that are best for both of you.
Success in Couples Therapy: Have Goals for Yourself, Not Your Spouse
Coming to couples therapy with the expectation the therapist will back you in every argument and your spouse will see the error of their ways—that’s setting yourself up for disaster. While it’s perfectly reasonable to desire your partner to change some aspect of their communication style or wishing they did more around the house, think about how you can express this goal with reference to what you can control—yourself! For example, rather than saying I came to couples therapy to convince my partner to clean up after they make a mess, try to phrase it in the following way: I’ve come here to learn how to express my needs to my partner constructively and to accept the things I can’t change about them. The outcome may be the same—you express your desire to have your partner help out with household chores—but the attitude is totally different.
The Power of Talk in Couples Therapy
Although it may seem like quite an obvious point to make, the simple reality is that so much can be achieved when two partners sit down and actually speak and listen to one another. This sentiment is as true when it comes to peace treaties after a conflict, as it is to employer-employee stand-offs and is certainly the case when it comes to couples’ therapy.
One of the biggest benefits that I offer my clients in New York City is a neutral space, where they can express their respective perspectives on the relationship. By removing the barriers to communication, it is far easier to fix the problems that exist by getting to the root of the problem.
One of the most commonly heard opinions that I hear from couples is that early in their relationship they always listened to each other but that as things progressed this sense of curiosity or mutual interest has waned and that things are now very different. Perhaps the biggest contributor to relationship stagnation and conflict is a lack of communication and one of the biggest factors that causes this sense of silence is a worry that each person has disappointed or failed to satisfy their partner.
The reality is that in many cases, your partner is not disappointed in you but is rather upset or feeling vulnerable about another issue. Once that perspective has been relayed to your partner, it can be easier to find resolution to the other problem. Again, my expertise in couples’ therapy can assist in this respect.
Couples Therapy After an Affair
One of the biggest challenges facing any couple in New York City, regardless of their gender or sexual orientation, is how to rebuild trust after an emotional or physical affair.
If you are seeking out couples therapy for these sorts of issues, know that no therapy practitioner can save your relationship for you. What Robin Bryant, Ph.D. does offer is the ability to communicate hurt and offer strategies to rekindle the secure relationship that existed before the affair.
All Shapes and Sorts of Relationships Welcome in Our Couples Therapy Practice
Most couples in NYC don’t subscribe to the traditional white-picket fence ideal of the nuclear family. That’s perfectly ok. Our couples therapists know the score—each couple is as unique as the people who are in the partnership, after all. We’re ready to help you tackle the issues that are important to you and your partner(s), and not to get hung up on the particulars of your situation.
We’ve helped clients in couples therapy from the following backgrounds:
- Second (or third, or fourth) marriages and new partnerships after divorce
- Same-sex relationships
- Bisexuals in a heterosexual or homosexual relationship
- Blended families
- Parents of adopted children
- Mixed-raced relationships and the pressures unique to them
- Open relationships
- Polyamory, and atypical relationship configurations
- May-December relationships, or relationships with large age differences
- Couples with one or more transgender or gender non-conforming individuals
- Couples involving kink or BDSM practices
Just because your family doesn’t look like a Norman Rockwell painting doesn’t mean you can’t seek help from a compassionate and experienced couples therapist.
Hard Times: Dealing With Anger Issues, Violence, Drug and Alcohol Abuse, and Other Tough Issues in Couples Therapy
Individuals in partnerships faced with problems such as anger issues, drug abuse, or violence face difficult situations not only in their day-to-day lives, but also in finding a safe space free of judgment to express their desires and needs.
Robin Bryant, Ph.D. is committed to helping individuals struggling with the above issues. Honesty and transparency are the only way to experience growth. If you bring your therapist in on these issues, you can make tremendous strides in addressing the way these issues affect your relationship. When you walk in our front door, we promise you a judgment-free zone.
Contact Me Today
If you are like most people in New York City, then the idea of fighting with your partner every day is undesirable and not viable in the long-term. My office works with many insurance networks—give us a call to find out if yours is compatible. If you want to return your relationship to how you envision it, then why not call Robin Bryant, PH. D. today—you won’t regret it!